*~ How To Get Yourself TO DO What You WANT To Do ~*

Most people  (including me) go through life complaining about all of the things they think are wrong with themselves. Sometimes we are not being grateful with what we are given. Allah knows the best for us, He is the Creator. He knows us better than ourselves.

“…., and it may be that you dislike a thing which is good for you and that you like a thing which is bad for you. Allah knows but you do not know.” (al-Baqarah: 216)

Even trying to accept what is fated for us is quite painful but, with the will from Allah, insyaAllah we can do it. Put the trust in Allah. Sometimes there are things that we give full hearted to it, but the result is not what expected. Maybe, the method is not right or we do not even know how to start. They just keep running in our mind. Then, here are some tips ‘how to get yourself to do what you want to do'. 

1^st :        What is your problem? What do you want to change about yourself?

Decide exactly and specifically what you want to do differently. For example, the problem of ‘A’ is overweight. Then, the first thing she would do to change herself is to lose weight.

“As long as you have any doubts or questions about your capabilities of being successful, you will continue to let yourself off the hook by using fuzzy thinking and unclear communications to yourself which make no demands for change.”

For every feeling there are behaviors that coincide. For every feeling they must be associated behaviors which support the belief that you feel that way. If you are a shy person you will avoid people by staying in your house much of the time. In short, to change yourself, you need to change the behaviors. The people who behave in positive successful ways tend to feel good about them.

2^nd :       Why can’t you change?

Find the answer for ‘What is stopping me from changing?’.  We must believe we are capable of changing. People always said that, “ I can’t help it because I was born that way.”  No matter what the behavior, ask yourself, “Who is really in charge of my doing things?”

3^rd :        How not to get yourself to do what you want to do

There are many obstacles that we have to confront in order to change. There is a built-in conflict between actually changing and being in the process of change. We must conscious whether we want to be in process of change or actually change. The difference is about the same as thinking about eating roti canai or actually eating it. Pay attention to what we say for ourselves. Avoid inability phrases like “I can’t” , “I never could” etc.

Interestingly, if you say “I can’t” to yourself long enough, you will begin to believe it and make it happen.

Avoid asking to self, “why did I do that?”, “why don’t I stop this?” and else. Regarding this book, when we ask a question, we do not anticipate any behavioral change; we expect some kind of answer. The paradox is, in order to get answer to that questions we must continue involved in the behavior so that the behavior can be questioned. So, make a decision!

Have wishes and desires are good. In order to be succeeding, we shall have the desire to achieve that.  But, the phrases “I wish I had more money”, “if only…….” and so on is not applicable to change our life. Take the action, regardless to just passively wait something miracle will happen!

“……Allah will not change (good) condition of a people as long as they do not change their state….”
(ar-Ra’d: 11)

Substituting the words wish, want, hope or desire with the words will, going, to or do; “I am going to have more money”. What you say is what you get, insyaAllah… ^_^

4^th :        Knowing what you do right

No matter how many problems or failures as a person has encountered in his life, he has also experienced many successes. We often overlook the successes because we become preoccupied with our problems and failures. 

5^th :        How to confront problem and change

Put together all of the information and show yourself either you are capable or not capable of doing what you want to do. Changing takes conscious effort and energy! Next, analyze the thoughts, rationalizations and excuses for not changing. Then, give credit for what you do right and how you do it. The last step is to know that you are capable of changing what you want to change, and to make it happen. What you think, is what you get!

6^th :        Making the decision

When you make a decision to change yourself, make a commitment to do whatever you have to do to make the change. The decision and commitment are tied up with the energy to change. We must use the power of mind to keep moving forward.

7^th :        How to help yourself change

World are getting stressful nowadays. When you are at peace yourself and relaxed, the process of making change is much easier. (I love this part of the book…=) ) The natural sounds like waterfalls, streams, bird and the like tend to create mental images of peaceful relaxation. Subhanallahil ‘adzhim... This book explains about calm technique, but we as a Muslim are really lucky. Because at least, 5 times a day we feel calm in our prayer. That’s why, even we only look the face of a pious person, and our heart feels calm.

There is one translated hadith: “Sabda Rasulullah SAW; Allah memperbagus wajah seseorang yang mendengar kata-kataku, memahaminya lalu mengamalkan seperti apa yang dia dengarkan” (HR Ibnu Majah, Abu Dawud dan Tirmizi)

Another love letter from our Creator;

“….and whose hearts find rest in the remembrance of Allah: verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.” (ar-Ra’d: 28)

Remember that,

“And I (Allah) created not the jinn and mankind except that they should worship Me (Alone).” (ad-Dzariat: 56)

And

“And seek help in patience and As-Salat (the prayer)…..” (al-Baqarah: 45)

Good luck!

Alhamdulillah wallahu a’lam…….Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

Dicedok dan diubah sedikit oleh pohon nyor dari buku ‘How To Get Yourself To Do What You Want To Do’ oleh Paul E.Wood.